A waste of time.

I guess I haven't added a new post in a while. Huh. I'm trying to figure out why, but I'm coming up with nothing. Aha! This is exactly why I haven't written in a while! It seems nothing has been happening...

I mean I could write about how the other night Nick decided we just HAD to go buy another season of Spongebob. All six of us piled into the car and went to Walmart since it was the only store open so late. We thought it would be fun to see how long we could go all linked together in a chain. The greeter was laughing so hard when she saw us trying to get through the doors that everyone else in the store had to look to see what she was laughing at. Then at the top of her lungs she started singing "Row Row Row Your Boat." (We still haven't figured out why she did that.)

See, that wasn't blog worthy.

Or I could write about how at the doctor's office we had to wait so long that Nick started playing with the chair---making it go up and down and recline, etc. When the doctor finally came in Nick was almost touching the ceiling.

No. That isn't quite interesting either.

What about last week when we went to the AB Honor band concert and sat in the front row. I was kissing Anna and she was freaking out that I was embarrassing her. So I decided to lick her forehead. She agreed that maybe kissing wasn't so bad...

And there are more, semi-interesting-but-not-quite---things that have happened. But nothing worth you wasting your time reading. So by not writing, I'm actually doing you a service and giving you more time to do more productive activities. You can thank me now.

We had the scavenger hunt tonight at the mall. I think it was a success. I kept forgetting that I was in disguise...I saw someone my husband works with and started talking to him. It took me a while to realize that he didn't recognize me! I finally told him that it was me and he wondered why I was dressed up like "Betty Boop." I figured that was better than "The Creepy Lady," which was what my daughter had been calling me all night!

Side note: Embarrassing and awkward things always seem to happen to me. So when embarrassing and awkward things happen to OTHER people, well...I just LOVE it!

Brian sent me an e-mail about his excitement this morning that I just had to post. And the best part of the story? It didn't even happen to me!

What a way to start the day.

So, there I was, sitting trying to mind my own business in my adopted stall in my adopted bathroom in the CAC (Music Building at WVU). Suddenly, I hear "clip clop clip clop" go by outside in the hallway. I figure I'm safe from being joined in my little pre-8 AM commune with nature. However, the clip clops get closer and closer. They get so close that they sound like they're in the little airlock area leading into this bathroom.

Then the door opens! Two people walk in. One goes into the stall beside me (the only other stall in this bathroom) and turns around in black, satin high heels with little black bows on the closed toes.

So, now my mind is racing. Did I really read "MEN" on the door like I thought I did on the way in? Did I see all the hallmarks of a men's bathroom on my way to the stall?

"Can you turn the water on?" the girl in the stall beside me asks. "Sorry, I'm just...you know."

So, apparently she has a companion with her who then turns the water on in one of the sinks.

Now my mind is really going. Surely she can see my shoes and knows that I'm not a girl. I've got my coat hanging over the crack in the door, so I can't even peek out to verify my own gender's porcelain accouterments on the opposite wall.

So, I sit very, very still and hope she doesn't start screaming at me and bring the police into this already uncomfortable situation. That, and I keep hoping she'll hurry up---I'll have to, well, finish things up AFTER she leaves; then I'll have to wait a couple minutes to make sure they are far down the hallway. And I parked in a 15-minute parking spot!

Tick tick tick tick tick....

Then the door opens again. A male voice says, "oh...well, this is awkward..."

One of the two girls answers, "we could NOT find a girl's bathroom!"

Whew! At least it wasn't me that was mixed up!

So, the magnanimous guy offers to show them where it is. He leaves. I get a little uncomfortable again when I hear the toilet paper roll turning.

Finally she flushes and is about to leave. Amongst all the things going through my head that I COULD say ("sorry about the mix up", "I won't tell if you won't", "Here are my keys---can you move my car?"), the thing that I feel like I can't resist saying is this:

"Nice shoes."

Hello?

I finally got the phone call this morning that I knew would someday come. 7:30am: "Mom, can you bring some spoiled eggs to school?"

Spoiled eggs? As I sat wondering just how long I'd have to leave eggs on the counter for them to "spoil" properly, my daughter grew impatient. "Mom, can you bring them as soon as possible?"

I tried to explain that it may take all day for eggs to spoil. Did she really want them now?

"Boiled Eggs!" she clarified. Boiled eggs for her chemistry class experiment. Ah, now that makes much more sense. And just to be on the safe side, I'll need to look up exactly how to spoil eggs just in case THAT call ever comes.

To be or not to be.

Or more specifically, who to be. It's time again for the youth scavenger hunt at the mall. Every year I convince 5-10 adults from church to dress up and "hide" in the mall. The youth have to answer clues and try to find as many of these adults as possible before time is up. It's been a fun activity.

The hardest part for me is trying to come up with some kind of costume clever enough to trick but not stand out, so my kids will have a challenging time finding me.

The first year I dressed up as a hooker. My friend let me borrow an awesome long blond wig and the rest of the costume sort of evolved from there. In the picture, I'm just getting ready to go next door to ask my neighbor if she had a more appropriate (or would that be inappropriate) shirt I could borrow to complete my ensemble.

When I explained what I was doing and what I needed, she was insulted. "You mean you think I would have a hooker shirt?!?" Gee, when she put it that way, I could see why she was offended. I assured her that I only meant she had better clothes than I did and she was more likely to have something "fun" I could wear. She laughed and immediately helped me, also insisting that I fix my skirt to make it shorter.

I don't have a picture of my complete ensemble---an "after" shot, with added accessories and new shirt---but you can get the general idea. Too bad you can't see my knee-high black boots...

When my son saw me, I went over to give him a hug. He pushed me away and my husband had to explain that it was me. With a horrified expression he squeaked out, "Mom?"

The next year, I dressed up as a jogger with a black wig.

Last year I decided to go as a very pregnant lady with a red wig.

So you can see my dilemma. I have to come up with something GOOD. I've gotten several great ideas, so I just need to see which one I can pull off.