Is there a method to the madness or just madness?

I was running through the house putting away laundry the other day. In the back of my mind, I knew something was a bit off. The cats usually follow me from room to room, but today as I ran down the hallways, they hid under my bed. It wasn't like I was in a hurry or anything. I just couldn't put my finger on it...

Laundry put away, I poured myself another can of dr. pepper. As I rinsed out the can and put it in the sink, I suddenly knew. Ahhh, there were already 5 cans in the sink.

I had started keeping my daily cans in the sink to monitor my drinking. Two cans---back to back--is good. Sometimes I need a third. I had just poured myself can number 6. No wonder why I felt kind of funky and a little too jumpy...it all made sense. "How did I not notice all the cans in the sink before now?" I wondered.

I would have to be more diligent from now on, I decided as I took a drink. Yes, moderation is important. I knew this for a fact as I started vacuuming out the couches. No one needs this kind of energy. It just isn't natural.

You'll have to make do because this is it.

I watched my friend's two little kids today. I have them over pretty often so it isn't a big deal. But today I had a headache. The little girl is a year and a half old and afraid of the cats, so we never play in the basement. After they arrived, I brought up the usual two boxes of little people for us to play with.

We set up in the living room and right away I realized there would be a problem. The last time the kids were over, Heather had taken the little boy down to the basement to play. He had seen all the little people we have down there. He knew the paltry two boxes I had brought upstairs was nothing compared to what we had.

"There are only THIS many little people here," he informed me, pointing to the pile he had made. "I'm sorry," I replied. I continued setting up my little people, purposely ignoring the hint that he wanted me to go downstairs and bring up more stuff.

After the third time complaining that things were missing, he started looking around. "Where is she?" he asked. "Who are you looking for?" His sister was sitting on my lap and no one else was home.

"I'm looking for the other Mindy," he replied. "The fun Mindy that gets all the toys for me." Oh right. That Mindy. My head still hurt and we had plenty of little people to play with. I wasn't about to drag everything upstairs.

"Where is she?" he persisted. "Sorry, but you're stuck with me today," I told him. He looked disappointed. It was okay. He wasn't the only one who was disappointed. I wish the fun Mindy was around too.

Not really what I had in mind...

Maybe it's punishment for skipping Sunday School, but Nicholas and I had to run home after sacrament meeting to get something he'd forgotten. On the way back to church we were almost killed. Seriously, we were on the freeway and a car in the other lane merged right into us. I veered onto the shoulder and it took several minutes before I could stop shaking enough to continue. Deep breaths. Very deep breaths.

The worst part of it was my ridiculous horn. I surprised myself that I had the presence of mind to remember that I even had a horn and really laid into it. "Toot toot." You have got to be kidding me. It was a: "Hiya, how ya doing?" kind of beep. Not the "HEY you almost rammed me off the road and KILLED ME!" blare, I had envisioned.

I really need to do something about that horn. I picture something louder with a little more attitiude.

I've got you babe.

All the kids were gone. For the whole day. It was very quiet. All alone for a change, we went out to eat. It felt strange without the usual incessant chatter from the kids.

"I'm not much of a talker, but I like being with you," my husband managed after another long silence.

I smiled. "It's okay. I like you too." Sometimes I talk enough for both of us.

One of those days.

I woke up this morning feeling like I just wanted to bite someone. No, I haven't been reading any vampire books and I'm not teething. My teeth just feel restless---like I want to...you know. But I figure that's pretty normal, right? Doesn't everyone feel like that every now and again.

It's not like there is someone SPECIFIC I want to bite or anything like that. But I am guessing that if I did bite someone, all of a sudden, people would be more likely to listen to what I have to say. And that wouldn't be a bad thing, would it?

Of course, I'm an adult and I understand the difference between wanting to bite someone and actually biting someone. I mean I haven't completely lost all grasp of reality. Even though it is hard to have a conversation with myself anymore, without me ending up looking completely incompetent or unstable. Why is that?

Just to be clear. Even though I want to bite someone. I will refrain from doing so. You understand, right?

It has arrived.

Okay so the mixer has arrived. Now what do we do with it? You can see from the picture that it is quite large (oddly reminiscent of the large speaker Brian received a few months ago...)

I KNOW---it has 32 input channels. But what do I do with it? It's not like I can stick it in the corner or push it under the counter or anything. The thing weighs 60 pounds, for pete's sake---which is the reason it is still sitting on the couch.

Yes, it's lovely to be able to walk over to it and touch it and drool on it. But IT IS SITTING IN MY LIVING ROOM! Apparently I'm having issues with the new toys Brian and Nick are acquiring. Not that I don't totally and completely think this equipment is awesome and I get chills knowing that we now own it...It's just that everything they get is so large. And for some reason these things tend to end up sitting in my living room for weeks on end.

Did I mention I have to find somewhere to put this fine mixer? Oh, I know. I'll just put it next to the speaker...

There are many reasons it isn't time to give up drinking my dr. pepper.

My husband has recently stopped drinking Pepsi Max. He hasn't mentioned or hinted to me that I should give up caffeine as well, yet. But just so everyone knows where I stand on the subject:

Thanks to drinking dr. pepper, I've learned many life lessons. For example, driving to church on Sunday I opened a can and it sprayed all over the front of my skirt. (I hate it when that happens. Perfectly good dr. pepper wasted.) "Girls, this [I point at my sticky, wet skirt] is why you shouldn't drink and drive." See? Life lesson.

Life lesson #2: Know your limitations.

I was at a book club meeting with my sister in Switzerland. (I just had to add that last part. It makes me sound so hip, doesn't it? A book club meeting---in Switzerland, no less!!!) Well, if it makes you feel any better, I hadn't read the book... Anyway, back to the dr. pepper. The hostess asked me if I wanted anything to drink. "I only drink in the morning," I told her. She looked at me very strangely. But it's true. I try to only drink dr. pepper in the morning and early afternoon. Otherwise I can't sleep at night.

Life lesson #3: Protect what's most precious.

I was drinking some dr. pepper when Tim came up to me. "I want some," he reached up for my glass. Usually I have no problem sharing. But this created at least 2 problems. First, a 4-yr old drinking caffeine? I don't think so. Second, what if he likes it? Then he'll drink all my pop!!!

"I'm sorry. It's my medicine," I told him. This is also the truth. Where would I be without it? (Lying in bed somewhere....) This didn't phase him a bit. [cough, cough] "I has a cough," he tried reaching up for my cup again. "Sorry, it's not cough medicine," I told him as I took the last gulp and went to get him something else to drink.

So although my husband has given up drinking his Pepsi Max, you can see that clearly there is more I can learn from my beverage. Besides, all this talk about dr. pepper is making me a tad bit thirsty.

Breakfast in the twilight zone.

The family was gathered around the table. It had been far too long since we'd all eaten a meal together so it was nice. My husband Brian, picked up a piece of bacon, "This looks like a tongue," he commented, as he arranged it to hang out of his mouth.

"Mom---dad is sticking his tongue out at me," Anna called out with mock indignation.

"Anna is talking with food in her mouth," Sarah observed from across the table.

"Sarah is tattling," My husband complained.

"Mom, dad is re-tattling...." Heather reported.

"Re-tattling isn't even a word," Sarah inserted, clearly not impressed.

I could tell this was never going to end if I didn't do something. "If it's possible to re-gift; you must be able to re-tattle," I announced loud enough to hopefully end the discussion.

I looked up just in time to see that I was wrong. It would never be over. My husband had just picked up another piece of bacon and was hanging it out of his mouth, moving it from side to side...Didn't we just have this conversation???

You can sleep well tonight. I got them all.

It started out 13 years ago with a crabby neighbor complaining that MY dandelions were ruining his lawn. It was our first home and I desperately wanted to be a good neighbor. I was eight months pregnant with 3 small children---but I spent hours each day diligently digging out each dandelion.

Somewhere it has changed from a simple desire to please, to a life altering obsession. But hey, a girl has to have a hobby. And as far as hobbies go, annihilation of dandelions isn't too shabby. Most importantly, I get to use a knife. I do own an actual tool made specifically for digging up dandelions (who knew such a tool even existed?!?) but I prefer the old steak knife which has been officially consecrated to the cause.

I have found that if I am constantly vigilant in my quest to rid the world of dandelions---one yard at a time (my yard, that is) it doesn't get very overwhelming at all. In fact, it can be quite relaxing.

So, as I was digging the splinters out of my hand this morning after a particularly nasty battle---I reminded myself that superheros don't cry. But it's okay for them to whimper and moan a little, right? I got a couple of blisters as well...those dandelions are really in for it now.

My Personal Welcoming Committee at the Airport...

At midnight I was getting off the last leg of my flight home. It had been a long day and in Switzerland it was 6am. I had been travelling all day and all night and I felt like it. Walking down the hallway I saw a small group of people wearing sombreros but could only see the hats. The people around me started laughing. "Yeah, I feel sorry for whoever they are waiting for," I teased. Then it hit me. Those hats looked familiar. "Hey, those are MY freaks!!!" I yelled out. My new friends laughed even harder. It had been a small flight, it was late and we had all gotten to know each pretty well. They thought it was funny.

Anna had spent the night at a friend's house so it was Brian and the 3 older kids who met me at the airport. I have to admit, I was surprised. But I was more surprised to find it was Sarah's idea to wear the hats. Of all my kids, she is the one who doesn't like to stand out or be noticed. There probably wasn't a single person in the airport who didn't comment on their signs or hats...

On the drive home my kids started listing things they needed from the store, Nick needed a haircut, etc. It was good to be home. But more important: It was good to be missed!

Can we at least share it?

I chew a lot of gum. And I'm not a pretty gum chewer either---imagine a cow chewing their cud and you get the idea. But when necessary, it allows me to sit for long periods of time and still feel like I'm doing something, so don't judge me too harshly. At church I require a lot of gum...

Tim sat on my lap during sacrament meeting today. "What you eating?" he asks, with his face seriously close to mine. "I'm not eating, it's gum," I whisper. He's now got his nose pressed against my lips inhaling deeply. "Mmmm," he smiles. "Open your mouth and let me see," he instructs. This kid is obsessed with gum and usually after smelling it and checking out what color it is, he's fine. Being obsessed with gum myself, I understand and open wide so he can take a look.

"I think I need it," he mumbles. But before I understand what he's said---his tiny fingers are in my mouth and he's stolen my gum. Chewing his newly acquired gum vigorously, he smiles and nods. "Mmmm," he repeats, "It IS good." I know. It was. I check my pockets---yep. It was my last piece.

Who knew a day of pampering could be so exhausting.

Julie took me to a spa on Saturday. It was lovely. I've never been to a spa where you spent the day and I was quite nervous. I mean this was Switzerland, afterall, and I have noticed that Europeans can be more, ah, free and open with their bodies, than I'm comfortable with. But my sister promised me I could wear my swimsuit the whole time and this wasn't like one of the Zurich spas where people would actually walk around naked. I tried to relax.

So we walked into the dressing rooms and I did a double take. We'd gone into the wrong dressing room! My German isn't too good, I couldn't believe what we'd done. I could feel my face turning red as I saw a MAN changing right in front of me. I whipped around to tell Julie before she got an eye full, "Julie, there are guys in here!" I told her in a panic.

She smiled. She knew. Apparently in Switzerland all dressing rooms are co-ed and supposedly she was so used to it, she didn't even think to mention it. Yeah, right.

It was a Roman bath spa and we went to a series of hot tubs and saunas which increased in their hotness. By the end they were so hot we could barely breath. I was very glad we had gone early because there was hardly anyone else there and we were alone most of the time. So we giggled and chatted and had a fabulous time---we only got in trouble for being too loud a couple of times.

I also got my first massage and a pedicure. I made Julie sit next to me for both. We had a wonderful day but I did wear my swimsuit home to change there...I guess I'll never really be European. But I'm okay with that.

Always room for one more...

The 4-year old twins just finished potty training before I arrived for my visit. So, for them, the bathroom tends to be another place for social interaction. They love to come in to talk during a shower and often follow me in when I have to take a quick potty break. At first I tried to explain that I was using the bathroom---but this didn't make sense to them. They came in anyway, and since there isn't a lock on the door...

Most the time, one of them will play in the sink and the other will stand right next to me while continuing the conversation we're having. I try to pull my shirt down and be as discreet as possible---but they are 4 and have no interest in anything other than chatting.

I was surprised one day, however, when I felt a small hand reach from behind as I made a quick potty break. I screamed, completely stunned! "What are you doing?" I asked Tim who stood innocently behind me, with a smile on his face and a wad of toliet paper in his hand. "I'm wiping," he replied, still smiling.

Instantly, Ben finished at the sink and stood in front of me. "You pooping? I can help wipe too," he offered, grabbing at the toliet paper. "No---I'm good," I assured them both, trying to decide whether to be mortified, humiliated, or if I should just start laughing. "You just tinkeling," Ben asked, eyeing me to make sure his services weren't needed. "Yes, I'm just tinkeling and i'm done." I promised---the whole time cursing the diet pop for making me have to pee so much...

Don't mess with the unstable crazy lady...

Today we went to the park for an Easter egg hunt. Before the hunt the kids played games and we played at the park. There was a giant jungle gym type thing Monica was climbing on. It looked interesting...

There were some older kids at the top who were shaking the jungle gym while I climbed up to the top. "Please stop," I called out politely. Yeah right, that worked. They started shaking it more vigorously. They were doing it on purpose.

"Stop shaking it, or I'm going to come up there and beat you up!" I threatened in the meanest voice I could muster (really, I wanted to laugh, when I saw the shocked look on the boys' faces.) It worked. The shaking stopped and one of the boys even climbed down and showed me the correct way to climb up to the top. Actually I was relieved. Not that I didn't think I could totally take them---2 smallish boys---not a big deal. But while climbing the jungle gym, they might have had the advantage. Plus, their moms were sitting down below watching.

One of the boys started hanging upside down and of course, to prove I was no whimp, I had to try it myself...at least I didn't fall and kill myself! Although now I'm feeling a bit sore...

I have the power.

I have this shirt. I wear it whenever I need a little extra boost or am feeling a little down. I woke up this morning with a sore throat. Can you believe it? I take it as a personal affront to get sick while i'm on vacation---It's unacceptable! I've decided to completely ignore it and not give it the satisfaction of slowing me down. It will not ruin my time in Switzerland with my sister.

So, anyway, I put on the shirt this morning. I don't wear it very often, just in case it loses some of it's power when I wash it. I came downstairs and the boys went crazy! They absolutely loved my shirt and have been stroking and caressing it all morning. "It's so pretty," they tell me. And it is. It's bright with every color swirled together. Tye-dye.

"You had this shirt in your suitcase this whole day (time)?" Ben asked, touching my sleeve lovingly. He couldn't believe I hadn't been wearing it every single day. "You have more of these pretty shirts in your suitcase?" Tim wanted to know if I've been holding out on them. Nope this was the only one, and between the shirt and the massive amounts of drugs, I was feeling much better.

I bent over and felt a whap on my behind. "Big," Ben yelled out. "Big," (another smack,) "Booty!" he ended with a final whack, followed by a chorus of laughter from the boys. I stood there wondering if I should feel insulted. But I had on the shirt. Any other day, maybe I'd have felt self-conscious. But today, in my shirt---me and my big, big booty are feeling fine.

Maybe I'm really a four-year old in disguise.

Ben and Tim think i'm cool. I kept them entertained for a half an hour on the train blowing bubbles with my gum.

We have the same conversation everyday. I don't even mind. They all start out the same, "What's your name again?" and they include questions about whether or not I have a car and a house somewhere. We never tire of this game. Tim wants to drive my car and Ben wants to visit my house.

I think it's funny when they burp.

When they get hurt, I can kiss them and make it all better. This no longer works with my teeagers at home.

We love gummy bears and sour worms. We ate a whole bag last night. Don't tell Julie..

When I wear my sunglasses, we always share. One of them will reach out and say, "It's my turn to be cool now." It's only fair.

I've decided to take them with me when I leave. I'm wondering if Julie will mind too much...but I feel like they are the only ones who really understand me.

A walk around Wettswil.

We have snacks, water and everyone ready to go for a walk!

James and George found a great bridge. They also found several places they want to build their secret fort...

Next to the pond was a huge marshy spot filled with reeds. I didn't want the boys to go into it---I was worried it would be swampy and they would sink in. Julie called out, "Don't be scared, go see if you can walk in it..." Then she looked at me and said, "You're not much of a 'boy' mom, are you!" It was a statement and it was true. I was freaking out much of the trip as the boys went from danger to danger. But they were fine, and Julie was right. With 3 girls, I'm not much of a boy mom...

Ben and Tim were more my speed. They were happy to stay in the stroller eating snacks on "horse poop" patrol. They made sure to let us know where it was, so we wouldn't push their stroller into it...Very helpful!

And behind curtain number one?

So i'm taking a shower this morning and enjoying the beautiful scenery outside the window when it hits me: if I can see out this window...EVERYONE CAN SEE ME! AACK! I take a few calming breaths and do the only thing I can in order to rinse out the shampoo in my hair and get out of the shower as quickly as possible. I pretend i'm invisible. Hey, don't mock me. It works for me.

Needless to say, we are putting up curtains today. I didn't think it would be an easy task. I mean, after we started this morning, I saw that my sister had perfectly legitimate reasons for putting off this task for so long. Personally, I would be content to give my neighbors and passers-by a free show for the unforseeable future if I had to overcome the curtain-hanging obstacle we faced today.

First we unscrewed the old rods---not too bad. But then Julie had to cut new rods to size. Holy cow---this is so a man's job...


Notice Julie is using the power tools...

Screw in new rods which coincidentally were the perfect size. And we think it was more luck than skill...we tried to use the power drill to screw in the tiny screws but ended up having to do them all by hand. bummer.

Final product: Room number 3 completed! The rest of the rooms will have to wait until after lunch. Our arms are killing us. Don't they look lovely? Julie sewed them!!!

trampolines and rooftops...

The last time I visited my sister Julie, it took several days for Tim and Ben to get used to me. They would look at me and watch me---not sure who I was and why I was there. This time, they have taken to me quite nicely and almost immediately. It is awesome.

Last night after dinner Ben came and stood next to me with his coat and shoes on. "Where are you going," his dad asked. "I'm going with HER." Ben replied, pointing to me. Well, I wasn't going anywhere, and when I told him that I was sleeping up in Monica's bed---he got very excited. "So you can come jump on the trampoline with me," he decided, taking my hand. I guess I could.

I've gotten hundreds of kisses and hugs, they crawled into bed with me this morning, and they came into the bathroom to talk to me while I was in the shower. The older kids are friendly and welcoming, but they are, well, older, and not as free with their love as the twins are. I absolutely can't get enough of it! I'm already dreading having to say goodbye to them when I leave.

"The sun is already awake," Tim tells me as we snuggle under the covers. "We can climb onto the roof and show you," Ben offers, putting his small feet on the wall like Spiderman. I smile thinking of the three of us sitting on the roof and the looks we would get from the cars driving past. Now that would be fun.